Monday, October 18, 2010

MUTTERINGS #35: THE DO-GOODER

Source: CV Library
A newly arrived immigrant walks into Woolies (Woolworths Supermarket). He finds cat food at special prices. He picks a dozen cans of cat food and goes to the check out.

Source: Virgin Media
 The Manager gets suspicious.

Source: Dangerous Intersection
He thinks that this guy might not have a cat and will probably eat the cat food himself. He shows the man cans of proper tuna, but the immigrant insists that the cat food would suffice. Still thinking that the man was going to eat the cat food, the Manager then asks the man to show him his cat before he could let him have cat food. The man goes home, returns with a cat and the manager allows him to buy the cat food.

Source: Love To Know
The next week, the immigrant sees in the junk mail, dog food at special prices. He goes back to Woolies, picks a dozen cans of dog food and goes to the check out. The Manager sees him and again gets suspicious. He thinks that this guy may have a cat but he could not possibly have a dog too and thinks that he will probably eat the dog food. Again, the do-gooder manager shows the immigrant cans of beef stew and fresh mince but the immigrant insists that the cans of dog food would suffice. The Manager once again asks the man to show him the dog before he can let him have dog food. The man goes home and returns with a dog. He gets to buy the dog food.

The following week the man comes to Woolworth's with a bag. He asks the manager to put his hand in the bag. The Manager puts his hand in the bag, feels something slimy and immediately pulls it out. He shouts at the man, "What the hell! This is shit, you Idiot!

Source: The Expired Meter

The man calmly replies, "Yes, now may I please buy some toilet paper?"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Moral of the story: There's help and then there's HELP. Don't stereotype people!



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Sunday, October 17, 2010

MUSIC #61: DJ DAVE – INGIN BERSUA 2010 (MALAY COMPILATION)


It is said that “Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery” and that Bollywood music directors have been notorious for plagiarising western music and making it their own....all in the name of appreciation and tribute to their western idols.

But what is lesser known is the imitation of Bollywood music by other musicians (apart from maybe the Black Eyed Peas) and singer-song writers....however one such artist was DJ Dave, a Malaysian Punjabi singer that made famous many Hindi songs of the 1960’s and 1970’s that he converted using Malay lyrics. Check out the compilation of his hits that I have compiled here and see if you can recognise the original Hindi songs.


A little about DJ Dave – born Sukhdev Singh, he took on the initials of his parents, Dhammi and Jagjit, and abbreviated his name to Dave, and viola, the birth of DJ Dave.

He started off as a mail sorter with Malaysian Post, with ambitions of becoming a Post Master but it all changed when one day, after singing a Hindi song at a children function. Already known as a great singer within social functions, he was asked by a young child why he wasn’t singing those beautiful Hindi songs in Malay. The very next day, he went to a recording studio for an audition and after being told he had to brush up on his Malay, he returned to studio six months later, his Malay polished and a contract! And the rest is history. Today, Dave has 35 hit music albums to his name, in five languages - English, Hindi, Malay, Cantonese and Punjabi.

The result of his success? The manager at Life, the recording company that signed him up, lost his job! Because he had overlooked tying Dave up in a long term agreement. EMI had moved in and signed Dave up for 3 years. And from then, for the next 20 years Dave stayed with EMI.


In the process, Dave revolutionized music in Malaysia by giving the local Indian and Malay people a huge inventory of great songs from Hindi movies sung in Malay. And in 1992, he started his own label Dave’s. D J Dave also goes by the name of Irwan Shah Abdullah, the name he took on when he converted to Muslim when he married his Malay wife. He received the Malaysian equivalent of a knighthood in 2005 which bestows him the title of “Datuk”.

His last album was, Mar Gaye Oye! in 2005, a collection of Punjabi songs, consisting of 8 tracks, of which three feature the famous Indian singer, Kavita Krishnamurthy.

Source: India Glitz

DJ Dave – Ingin Bersua: A compilation of DJ Dave’s songs

1. Ingin Bersua (I’d Like To Meet)

2. Sendiri Lagi (Alone Again)

3. Mana Janji Mana Cinta (Where’re the Promises, Where’s the Love)

4. Air Mata Kasih (Tears of Love)

5. Sungguh Kau Istimewa (You Are So Special)

6. Pesan Untuk Teman (A Message For A Friend)

7. Pengantin Tiba (The Bride Has Arrived)

8. Masa Yang Lepas (Time Forgone)

9. Ku Cium Pipi Mu (I Kiss Your Cheeks)

10. Seruling Kasih (Flute of Love)

11. Kanda Dan Dinda (My Husband and My Wife)

12. Ku Tak Ingin Menangis Lagi (I Don’t Want To Cry Anymore)

13. Tuah Badan (Luck Of The Draw)

14. Maafkanlah (Forgive Me)





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Friday, October 15, 2010

MUSIC #60: LAKHON ME EK 1971 (HINDI OST)


Lakhon Me Ek (literally translated = “one in a hundred thousand” but actually means “One In A Million”) the album is just as it name suggests….a rare gem that has gotten lost in music obsecurity, in my opinion, only because the film did not boast the superstars of the era. It did however star the Bollywood comic of all time, Mehmood. I know I saw this movie as a kid but I have to admit I can’t remember much, if any actually, about it. Another DVD to add to my want list, that’s for sure.

The album is by Rahul Dev Burman and lyrics are by Anand Bakshi. The most famous and popular song from this album is “Chanda O Chanda” and one of my favourites. Check out the youtube clip included in this post. Next on my list would be “Main Tera Naam”, a very ‘cabaret’ sounding tune but unfortunately, I could not find any clippings for it. Would have really loved to see the dance scene….so if anyone out that has a clipping, please do share! And then there’s “Jogi O Jogi”, a real hoppity tune that had me imagining Jeetendra and Leena Chandravakar, doing their crazy dance scenes in beat with this tune. And if you like parody tunes, “Mere Samne Wale” will surely get you going! So sit back and enjoy this one in a million soundtrack.



My verdic: 4 stars


Lakhon Me Ek 1971 – Original Soundtrack

Side One

1. Chanda O Chanda – Lata Mangeshkar

2. Ye Duniya – Mohd Rafi and Asha Bhosle

3. Main Tera Naam – Asha Bhosle

Side Two

1. Jogi O Jogi – Lata Mangeshkar and Kishore Kumar

2. Chanda O Chanda – Kishore Kumar and Lata Mangeshkar

3. Mere Samne Wale – Manna Dey and Asha Bhosle

4. Title Music – Instrumental


PS: Thank you Mr Naidu for finding the song clip of "Main Tera Naam". Here tis'.



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Thursday, October 14, 2010

MUTTERINGS #34: SEVEN DEGREES OF BLONDE


FIRST DEGREE

A married couple were asleep when the phone rang at 2 in the morning.

The wife (undoubtedly blonde), picked up the phone, listened a moment and said, "How should I know, that's 200 miles from here!" and hung up.

The husband said, "Who was that?"

The wife said, "I don't know, some woman wanting to know if the coast is clear."

SECOND DEGREE

Two blondes are walking down the street.

One notices a compact on the sidewalk and leans down to pick it up.

She opens it, looks in the mirror and says, "Hmm, this person looks familiar."

The second blonde says, "Here, let me see!"

So the first blonde hands her the compact.

The second one looks in the mirror and says, "You dummy, it's me!"

THIRD DEGREE

A blonde suspects her boyfriend of cheating on her, so she goes out and buys a gun.

She goes to his apartment unexpectedly and when she opens the door she finds him in the arms of a redhead.

Well, the blonde is really angry.

She opens her purse to take out the gun, and as she does so, she is overcome with grief.

She takes the gun and puts it to her head.

The boyfriend yells, "No, honey, don't do it!!!"

The blonde replies, "Shut up, you're next!"

FOURTH DEGREE

A blonde was bragging about her knowledge of state capitals.

She proudly says, "Go ahead, ask me, I know all of them."

A friend says, "OK, what's the capital of Wisconsin ?"

The blonde replies, "Oh, that's easy: W."

FIFTH DEGREE

What did the blonde ask her doctor when he told her she was pregnant?

"Is it mine?"

SIXTH DEGREE

Bambi, a blonde in her fourth year as a UCLA freshman, sat in her US government class.

The professor asked Bambi if she knew what Roe vs. Wade was about.

Bambi pondered the question then finally said, "That was the decision George Washington had to make before he crossed the Delaware ."
SEVENTH DEGREE

Returning home from work, a blonde was shocked to find her house ransacked and burglarized.

She telephoned the police at once and reported the crime.

The police dispatcher broadcast the call on the radio, and a K-9 unit, patrolling nearby was the first to respond.

As the K-9 officer approached the house with his dog on a leash, the blonde ran out on the porch, shuddered at the sight of the cop and his dog, then sat down on the steps.

Putting her face in her hands, she moaned, "I come home to find all my possessions stolen.

I call the police for help, and what do they do?

They send me a BLIND policeman!!!

***********************************

Love is blind and what’s more it is colour blind!



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Wednesday, October 13, 2010

MUSIC #59: THE CITY SLICKERS – A GO! GO! 1960s (INSTRUMENTAL)


I tried and I tried, I looked everywhere….I could find no reference to this band….all I got from Google was City Slickers, the definition from Wikipedia and the Hollywood movie starring Billy Crystal. Then I found a reference to Spike Jones with his back up band, The City Slickers. Not sure if it’s the same, but check out this WIKIPEDIA link. So sorry folks, no-can-give-info; but most appreciate some, if you had. Ta.

Regardless, not one of the better instrumentals (reading the commentary on the back of the LP one would not have thought so) but there are some old time favourites here and also, the different genres of music. So basically, there is something here for everyone. If I had to describe this album, I’d call it elevator music. See if you agree. My rating: 2.5 to 3 stars.


The City Slickers: A Go Go (1960’s)

Side One

1. Everybody Loves Somebody Sometime (Foxtrot)

2. Born Free (Slow Rock)

3. My Love (Twist)

4. More (Cha Cha Rock)

5. Some Sunday Morning (Fox Trot)

6. Somewhere My Love (Waltz)

Side Two

1. Red Roses For A Blue Lady (Fox Ttrot)

2. Strangers In The Night (Slow)

3. Secondhand Rose (Fox Trot)

4. I Wish You Love (Cha Cha Rock)

5. Poison Ivy (Twist)

6. The Wedding (Slow Rock)



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Monday, October 11, 2010

MUTTERINGS #33: SENIOR WEDDING


Arrgh....Mondays should be abolished, especially today! But I needed a break so you are stuck with this joke. One phase of my life that I am not looking forward to...Wait....I already have some of those symptoms! HELP….

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Jacob, age 92, and Rebecca, age 89, are all excited about their decision to get married. They go for a stroll to discuss the wedding, and on the way they pass a pharmacy.

Jacob suggests to Rebecca that they go in. Jacob addresses the man behind the counter.

Jacob: "Are you the owner?"

The owner/pharmacist answers: "Yes."

Jacob: "We're about to get married. Do you sell heart medication?"

Pharmacist: "Of course, we do."

Jacob: "How about medicine for circulation?"

Pharmacist: "All kinds."

Jacob: "Medicine for rheumatism?"

Pharmacist: "Definitely."

Jacob: "How about suppositories?"

Pharmacist: "You bet!"

Jacob: "Medicine for memory problems, arthritis and Alzheimer's?"

Pharmacist: "Yes, a large variety. The works."

Jacob: "What about vitamins, sleeping pills, Geritol, antidotes for Parkinson's disease?"

Pharmacist: "Absolutely."

Jacob: "Everything for heartburn and indigestion?"

Pharmacist: "We sure do."

Jacob: "You sell wheelchairs and walkers and canes?"

Pharmacist: "All speeds and sizes."

Jacob: "Adult diapers?"

Pharmacist: "Sure."

Both Jacob and Rebecca look at each other and nodded with a smile.

Jacob: "We'd like to use this store as our Bridal Registry, thank you."



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Sunday, October 10, 2010

MUSIC #58: JHUK GAYA AASMAN 1968 (HINDI OST)


Jhuk Gaya Aasman (The sky has relented) is a 1968 movie starring Rajendra Kumar and Saira Banu. It was directed by Lekh Tandon with music by Shankar Jaikishan, and lyrics by Hasrat Jaipuri, Shailendra and S.H Bihari (see the back of the LP cover for the listing)  . The film is a remake of the Hollywood film "Here comes Mr. Jordan (1941)". It performed "below average" at the box office but did rather well musically.



The most notable song from this movie would be "Kaun Hai Jo Sapnome" an outright copy of the song "Marguerita", an Elvis Presley song, from his movie "Fun In Acapulco" (see my posting HERE). It is one of my favs from this album, along with "Kahan Chal Diye" and "Unse Mila Nazar". I give this OST 3.5 stars.



Side One
  1. Kahan Chal Diye - Mohd Rafi
  2. Unse Mila Nazar - Lata Mangeshkar
  3. Sacha Hai Pyar (Happy) - Mohd Rafi
  4. Kisiki Jaan Lete Hai - Asha Bhosle
Side Two
  1. Kaun Hai Jo Sapnome - Mohd Rafi
  2. Meri Ankhon Ki Nindiya - Lata Mangeshkar and Mohd Rafi
  3.  Mere Tumhare Beech Me - Lata Mangeshkar
  4. Sacha Hai Pyar (Sad) - Mohd Rafi


 


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